Pre Mission Trials

Preparing for a mission definitely puts you in the limelight of the devil, just like when people ponder about getting baptized. When people are about to make a great decision or covenant with God, the devil knows he will lose power and influence, so he rounds up all his forces against those groups of people. Joseph Smith, just before he saw God and His Son, was tormented by the devil, David, before he slew Goliath, was ridiculed for size and skill. Just before great miracles and works from Heaven, there is always a substantially increased force of opposition.
Before these great happenings occur, the devil uses his most refined and particular temptations for each specific person involved to stop it from happening. I knew that that when I started my mission papers temptations and challenges would arise, but to a degree like this no one can relate until they experience these pressures firsthand.

I have been through some of the greatest trials of my life in the past couple months. Occupational inconveniences, an abnormal lack of the Spirit in my living place at school, extremely critical and judgmental peers (enough to make anyone offended), lack of emotional support, relationship struggles with so many people, huge feelings of inadequacy and despair, faith-straining experiences, overload of school projects and other responsibilities, health hurdles, mission paper technological issues and appointmental issues, so much discouragement toward a mission, including advice to just get married, mockeries of my failures, and feelings that so much depends on me but few people care about me.

These are just what come to mind right now. This is not to make anyone feel sorry for me, no, not at all. My intent is to explain how perfectly these trials are setting me up for the greatest next step of my life. Many people are aware of the allegory of the fruit tree, and how a boy noticed other boys throwing rocks at a fruit tree. When the boy asks why these people are throwing these rocks at such a fruitful source, the answer is simple. The people wouldn't throw rocks at the tree unless the tree was full of good fruit. These are reasons I know, despite all the anti's coming at me, that I am doing the right thing. Ether 12:6 says "Ye receive no witness until after the trial of your faith," which answer I know will come because of my trials. This road has not been easy, nor have I come through perfectly or completely, but "I know in whom I have trusted", (2 Nephi 4:19) and I know these things will "give me experience" and "work together for [my] good" (D&C 90:24, D&C 122:7).